Random Occurances & Traffic Reports

Brad and I were driving East on Santa Monica Boulevard today (yes, I know it’s Tuesday and I should be working, so fuck off) and right around Formosa, Brad exclaimed, “Check out this guy. Whoah! Look at his walk!”

“Sashay, sashay,” I replied.

“Oh my God he looks ridiculous!”

This was quite obviously a gay white man in his late 20s/early 30s. He had on an old man style tweed golf cap perched on his head with his clean shaven face, a navy blue wifebeater and jeans. He was gliding down the Boulevard as if it was a catwalk and as if he were Naomi Campbell on sedatives. Good posture though, I must say.

As we drove past him, we noticed the massive amounts of chest hair crawling out from under the wifebeater like rusty colored millipedes in a frat boy’s shower when the lights are turned on. Disgusting! We then stopped at a light and got to watch him sashay past us once more.

After a few minutes, Brad all of a sudden innocently asked, “If I were to get my chest waxed, how long do you think it’d take before the hair would grow back?”

“Six weeks, give or take.”

“That’s it?! Forget about it. Not worth it. Not that I was thinking about doing it anyway. I just want to make that clear.”

Ay ay, captain.

This entry was posted on Tuesday, August 16th, 2005 at 8:03 pm and is filed under Uncategorized. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.